Brain cancer is...making me ask:
...can you see the wave?
Today, while Darrell was having his blood drawn, I read the 50+ pages of his medical record (paper copy of the fax to UCLA) that begins with his ER admission. Nothing new, but seeing it in third person ("Patient is a 55-year old male..." "Patient denies smoking..." "Heart and other systems normal"...) made me and then us (because I can't keep quiet) relive the experience.Glioblastoma is its own kind of awful. When we read the stats...prevalence...median survival rate...MGMT status...recurrence rates...all of it, it feels like a huge, crashing wave.
I need you to say that you, too, see the crashing wave. "Hey, stay positive!" We're sure trying. Does the casual acquaintance with that advice see the wave? Or is he in the sand, facing us, with his back to the impending crash? ("My aunt had squamous cell cancer and she's a 20-year survivor!") Please, can you say that you've seen the wave and that you still believe?
Thanks for keeping an eye on the horizon.
I see the wave! Every cancer patient is different and the stats are population based.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Mer for seeing what we see! Very reassuring!
ReplyDeleteI see the wave and I believe Darrell is going to surf that wave and win!
ReplyDeleteI see the wave looking at its mirror image in the face of the (equally as strong, graceful and majestic) Guillaumes! The wave says, "Wow!"
ReplyDeleteGreat idea, Christine! To see it from the wave's perspective. Watch out wave!
DeleteYes, I see the wave. And I see two transparently honest people bracing and supporting each other. I also see the millions of grains of sand that are swept away daily only to be pushed back to shore (by the wave) where they stick together and sparkle in the sunlight.
ReplyDeleteThat is such a helpful analogy Donna! We definitely have hundreds of fellow grains of sand sticking with us...and they are sparklers for sure! Thank you!
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ReplyDeleteHi Andi,
ReplyDeleteI see the wave, and I see the wave from another perspective too.
Have you read "The Median Isn't the Message" by Stephen Jay Gould? He addresses the wave that he experienced. I use this article to teach mean, median, mode, and range to my students. Now, every time I give back a test in class, their first question is "What's the mean?" quickly followed by "What's the median?" Then they ask me if there is a skew. Regardless of a skew, the median has actually provided a sense of positivity in the room, and provided a great learning experience on attitude and hope, something you both have down.
Lots of love to you both. Thinking about you every day.
I see the wave.
ReplyDeleteI am here to hold you up. Thinking of you both very often, and planning you a surprise. Hugs to you all.
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