Five Reflections

Brain cancer is...

Funny funny Darrell

Always Darrell

 ...five months past surgery.

Darrell's surgery to remove 80-85% of his brain tumor was five months ago today. During Darrell's recovery in the hospital, Summer and Zach brought us In-n-Out, the California version of comfort food.  Today we celebrated five months with more comfort:

Yes, that is a chocolate shake. 

While we munched fries, we reflected on the GBM journey thus far.  Here are five reflections for five months:

1. The Big Fat Cancer Baby rarely visits us these days.  When the baby does come, it makes for a pretty tough day, but its visits are currently infrequent.  My interpretation is that the scalding shock of the diagnosis has worn off and we're integrating it into who we are.  Now we get on with the business of life.
2. We have learned that we can face the wave without being swept away by it.  Now, for at least a few minutes at a time, we can face the enormity of the diagnosis without needing to hold onto heavy furniture.  We thank you, Team D, for showing us the other waves we face, like the huge force of your prayers, thoughts, and incredible levels of care for Darrell and our family.
3. We have come to terms with trading in our few long-term plans for many short-term plans.  Sometimes Darrell feels sad about not making long-term plans like buying more property, but we are grateful for every second of today and for the tomorrows that are mere hours, days, and months away.
4. We have learned (some of) our limits.  After five months, we can admit--without feeling like total losers--when we hit our limits.  Darrell's need to limit group size and social interaction is one example.  Andi's new limits in handling complex troubleshooting for digital tools is another.  It doesn't feel that bad, actually. 
5.  We have experienced great love.  We had no idea of just how well connected we humans are through our care for each other.  Sue Hughes calls them "big circles."  We call it "awesome."

We know that the next five months of this journey will probably be different from the first five in ways we cannot anticipate, but we know we've got the team to face whatever comes.

Thanks for first five months of Team D.