My Husband, My Hero

Brain cancer is...

 

...hero status:  Solidified!

Today Darrell went back to St. Jude Wellness and Rehab Center.  I know you remember speech therapy there, with Maureen, in May.  But things change.  When one series of sessions ran out, just before our trip to Catalina, we didn't renew.

This time Darrell joined the center as a member of the cancer recovery program called STAR.

It was a difficult morning.  Joining this program meant intake evaluations by Occupational Therapy and Physical Therapy in addition to a new evaluation for Speech Therapy.

For the past several months, we've spent our lives learning to use work-arounds, to be positive, and to focus on what is possible today.

In fact, while we were sitting, waiting early this morning, Darrell loved reading this wall art:

The hard lesson today is that the philosophy of "living in the present moment wisely and earnestly" must be reconciled with the goals of therapy.  For us, therapy seems centered in yesterday ("What happened?") and tomorrow ("What can we do?"). 

Each therapist probed around until he or she found areas of weakness that could benefit from therapy.  Examples include eye-hand keyboard coordination and hip and hamstring weakness, in addition to the most important speech diagnosis:  Dysarthria.  

No doubt you can imagine what it felt like for Darrell to, first, revisit the February hospital visit, which included Kristin (the original "name the animals, or just say 'Dragon'" woman), and, second, to be in a facility that is focused on tomorrow.  We heard from a young person going through physical rehab because a mosquito bite pulled her into the world of West Nile Virus, and we struggled beside an older man navigating the new world of Parkinson's disease. 

Probably the most difficult part of today that these rehab/wellness patients of all ages (10 months to 100 years) were future-directed.  We have not been. We have lived in the present.  What, then, are we doing at therapy?

If we zoom out in the wall art by the Buddha that Darrell so appreciated early on, we see the larger message:  "Journey."  

How is focusing on today part of the journey?  We don't know.  This stuff is hard.

Darrell has agreed to return for many speech sessions to address his dysarthria and a couple sessions of OT to pin down the letters on the keyboard (they keep moving!).  But we struggle with the notion of fighting for a better tomorrow while we are so focused on appreciating today.

For this reason, Darrell is my hero.  

And also for this reason, all the people at the rehab center today are our collective heroes.

Best to you as you decipher your most important goals and how your goals work together:  Today's and tomorrow's.